Private Vs. Public

It's funny that this has come up at a time when I have been feeling like writing some very personal things on my blog. I made my blog private last night after dealing with some stupid stuff on a website, but have decided that I am not going to let the same few people dictate this blog and what it means to me. The emails and messages have flooded in from readers and supporters and I realized just how many read my blog. I planned to keep it private and "invite" them to be on my reader list, but honestly, I hate private blogs for the most part and I love the networking aspect of having my blog. So screw it. :)

Now to the blog post I have been thinking about for days now...

I've been thinking a lot lately about having really good girlfriends in my life, or I should say, lack of, right now. Since moving here a few years ago it's been really hard to meet people. It doesn't help that I am just not all that outgoing and social so I am happy to be at home with my dogs and husband. I also work for just one guy so I have no opportunity to meet people through work. When you are out of school and don't have a job where you meet other women, it's so hard to make friends. How do people do it?

The person I would consider my best friend down here is amazing, but we just don't see each other as much anymore which really sucks. She is busy working full time and has a baby which is totally understandable of course. I hope that once we have Lucas that will bringing us closer together again like we used to be when it was just two couples.

My mom always had friends she'd see all the time and talk to on the phone daily. I'm really missing out on that. I feel like I have quite a few female acquaintances and okay friends, but I can't help but feel like I am missing out on a close knit group of girlfriends.

I know it's mostly my own fault because I don't put the effort in that I need to. I've met some great women in the past 6 months or so, but everyone is just so busy (or lazy if you're me!) that it's been hard to get together and keep things going. Plus, everything was/is still in that new friend stage that can be awkward. You know like "hey do you want to be my friend" stuff or are we just hanging out because we planned this get together? Couple that with the fact that I am so content to just be at home, not spending time or money going out with girlfriends, and it just makes it all really hard.

I "know" someone (all the way in California) who is part of a mom's group I believe and the group has a lot of the same views on parenting and stuff and I just imagine how nice that would be. I would LOVE to find something like that, but where I live people are a bit more conservative than I am when it comes to parenting, religion, etc. Nothing wrong with that, but isn't it hard to become really good friends with people who have totally opposite views on just about everything? Past experiences have proved that it was an issue for me. I had a friend who I was fairly close to for awhile when we first moved here, but she made some comments re: gay people that I just could not get over. I wish I could find a "crunchy" mama group around here, but sadly in The Bible Belt, I am not sure how feasible that is.